Carnivorousness

If you come in my cage I'll eat you too!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Miss C is afraid of no man!

Miss C's Dad was a mean motherfucker. He always told Miss C not to be afraid of anything or anyone. He said, "They can only hurt, or kill you." In my office there is a girl that is the distributor of supplies. We call her the purser. In the old timey days, the ships purser would buy supplies for a long journey. At the end of the journey, the purser would sell the leftover supplies. So it was in his best interest to distribute supplies sparingly. Our girl Friday distributes supplies as if she were a ship's purser. Like my old boss said, "I'd rather shit in my hands and rub it in my hair than ask that woman for supplies." Well, I second that remark. I'd rather wipe my runny nose on my sleeve or use those brown sandpaper towels, the City buys in such abundance, to catch the drips. Getting a box of Kleenex from the purser is like pulling an elephant's tusk with your bare hands. It's near impossible and downright dangerous. She makes you pay dearly for anything you ask for. Sometimes it's not worth it. The other day, I remarked, in the purser's hearing, that I was running short of Kleenex but had heard her giving 2 other co-workers the third degree over Kleenex the day before. I said, to the general occupants of the room, that I was afraid for my life and wasn't sure if it was worth it. Maybe I should bring my own Kleenex, I pondered aloud. Girl Friday took offense. I went to lunch and when I returned I heard her talking to another co-worker about my comment. I overheard the co-worker say to the purser, "(Miss C's given name, ) is afraid of no man, or woman. She is not even afraid of the Devil himself! Don't believe her!"

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